WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY!

Picture Above (Andrew, Terese, Kim, Jamie)

I (Andrew Cosentino) first met Jamie while working for Elyse Connolly in NYC during my senior year of college. Elyse had a very good friend at Sarah Lawrence College (where Jamie went) who recommended Jamie to work for Elyse as an assistant / producer. I was a bit hesitant about it, being the only guy in the office. But to my happiness, Jamie turned out to be a breath of fresh air. We got along quite well from the beginning. She had the same sense of humor I had. I soon learned we had a lot of interests in common…love of sports (fans of the Yankees, Giants and Rangers), love of family and friends and a strong work ethic. She made work fun. Days when she wasn’t there were noticeably different and stagnant. I feel I need to thank the powers that be that had me end up at Elyse’s office and at the same time that Jamie joined. Had I not, I feel I would’ve missed out on some of the most unique parts of my life. I deeply cherish the times we would stay at Elyse’s and open a bottle of wine or go to a bar after work and just talk…for hours. Jamie was the perfect person to talk to. She was so intelligent, so well versed, so insightful. Countless discussions about life, death, people, family, situations, food, ect. I felt she always had my back, but she’d be the first to speak her mind and put you in place if need be.

It always astounded me how close she was with her family…esp her younger sister and brother. She seemed to be a great big sister. She would give advice to Kathryn about school, boys, ect. She would talk to Doug about college and whether or not she approved of his girlfriend. I know she admired her parents’ work ethic. They were both professionals and went far in their careers. Jamie adopted this as if it was second nature. I remember Dan (Jamie’s father) sent Jamie and Doug to Florida (I think) so a family friend could teach them how to sail. I thought that was so awesome! Jamie took a video camera and documented the trip.

I have so many awesome and fun memories with Jamie but this one sticks out at the moment. Jamie was living in a sub-let apartment in NYC on 16th street. I was over at her place watching a Yankee game having some beers and snacks. There was a press conference after the game and a very young looking reporter was grilling Joe Torre relentlessly. You could tell Joe wasn’t in a good mood. Jamie started yelling at the TV…screaming who the hell do you think you are?!!! How dare you disrespect Joe Torre, you little chump??!! Then I got into it…yelling repeatedly, you don’t talk to Joe Torre like that!!! How ‘bout I kick your ass!! This went on for a while. The next thing we know, we got a call from the building management office saying we were being written up on noise complaint charges and it would affect her status with management. Apparently, the next door neighbor thought we were a couple having a heated domestic dispute. Recalling what we were screaming at the reporter on TV, we could see how it could be taken that way. I remember the simultaneous feeling of embarrassment and hysterical laughter.

On a much less funny memory, Jamie and myself (along with her friends Gabe and David) were together on September 11th 2001. We all went to the Yankee – Red Sox game the night before. It was rained out, yet we stayed at the stadium and drank and had a good time. We all crashed at Jamie’s place in Brooklyn. The next morning will forever be etched in my mind. I was silent in shock, while Jamie burst into hysterical tears. I remember Jamie softly whimpering for her dad. I think her dad had worked at the twin towers and would bring her there as a kid. I was grateful I wasn’t alone that day. I was with a close friend and we were there for each other in the worst day in American history.

I recall being at a Yankee game sitting in the bleacher section with Jamie and her sister Kathryn. They were both walking up the isle to return to our seats and I threw a peanut at them. A security guard came up to me and said I had to leave for throwing something. I said it’s ok they are with me. He said too bad, I still had to leave. I told him I wasn’t going anywhere. He replied, we can do this the easy way or the hard way. I said let’s go hard (clearly my beer muscles were fully flexed, lol) Then one of NY’s Finest came over and said to leave. That’s when Jamie grabbed my arm and said you’re not going to jail…we are leaving. I owed her for that one!! I’m very grateful for not having a police record that day!

We would talk about our futures often. Both wanting to find our soul mate and have kids. I remember she said she would be “rich Aunt Jamie” and would take my kids to Paris once a year. (I was completely fine with this being that I wouldn’t have to finance a trip to Paris every year, lol!) But that sort of resonated with me in that she already knew she would be wealthy, but more so, she didn’t think she’d meet the right person and have her own family. She would be the single aunt who spoiled my kids. That was always one thing I never understood about her…her self doubt. She wasn’t always happy with herself. It drove me nuts because here is someone who has it all. Absolutely stunningly beautiful, highly intelligent, great sense of humor, got along with everyone she met, simply fun…yet she didn’t always think so. She termed it as having high-highs and low-lows.

So needless to say, I was elated when I found out about Paul. She never talked about anyone the way she did about him. We finally met Paul in 2007 at dinner in Queens. We went for drinks after dinner and it was so much fun! I knew that night he was the one. I could see how Paul absolutely adored her and how kind he was to her. They danced together and laughed together. I could tell Paul was a great guy (I’m a pretty good judge of character). It gave me incredible happiness that Jamie finally met a genuinely great loving man who would treat her the way she deserved to be treated. I saw how they were at my wedding…dancing non-stop; laughing non-stop. I had such a great time at their wedding. It was so much fun! I remember seeing Jamie so happy…smiling and laughing all day and night. Watching Paul’s boys clapping their hands to the point of raw red skin. It was their thing and I thought it was awesome!

This is, by far, the worst nightmare anyone who is viewing this website could’ve ever dreamt. It’s just too unbelievable for words. I am so utterly grateful I had Jamie in my life for so many years. I am thankful Jamie and my wife became friends and shared their personal experiences. It was so amazing that we were pregnant at the same time…twice! Just overjoyed that, although we lived far away, we would have kids the same age. She left 3 absolutely wonderful and beautiful children and I look forward to watching them grow up and hear stories about them, even it if is through pictures/videos/facebook. This website is absolutely perfect and I am thankful to Paul, Kathryn and Brian for putting it all together. It is such a great tribute to honor Jamie’s memory. I find myself on it everyday. I look forward to reading more about the amazing Jamie O’Brien Kindem through stories and posts from all of her friends and family. I am also grateful that Mr. and Mrs. O’Brien invited my wife Terese and I back to Jamie and Paul’s home after her services. It was so nice to finally see their beautiful home. Simply put, I miss my friend terribly. Jamie inspired me to live a better, more fulfilling life. Paul, you inspire me to be a better husband to my wife through your words and actions with Jamie. I am just so grateful to you both.

All my love,

– Andrew Cosentino

Andrew wrote the following poem shortly after hearing out about Jamie’s Death and he was generous enough to allow me to post it to the website:

I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces
Your dad called and told me you didn’t make it
A million tears defined by a million memories
A new kind of pain I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemies
I cry to the sky
WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY!
I miss your smile, your laugh, your words
A symphony of soothing syllables; more intelligent than all my college professors
So many good times embedded in time
Blew my mind how bright you could shine
The most unique person I ever knew
A refreshing dose of happiness…like the morning dew
I could talk to you like no one else
You gave me such a needed sense of self
How could this happen?!!
Did heaven really need any more perfection?
I used to think everything happens for a reason
You are now the one thing that makes me long for skepticism
I see you in everything beautiful
A reassuring feeling that you are incredible
My wish for you is eternal peace
Floating on a calm lake, I’d command the sun to warm your face
You shine so bright
You make darkness bleed light
I wish the heaviness on your family to shy
May you live on in all of us, so that even death may die