ROOTS

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ROOTS

As I (Regan Teti Marscher) told Maureen at Jamie’s service – Jamie exists at the very root of my soul. We literally “grew up” together in middle school and then high school.

Although we knew each other already, Jamie and I first really connected at Camp Tockwogh in MD the summer before 8th grade. We were in the same cabin and I remember us being so comfortable around each other. We both LOVED the Little Mermaid which was recently released. I have a vivid memory of the two of us at the side of the camp pool pretending to be Ariel when she bursts out of the water during a reprise of “Part of Your World” . We then continued showing off that little stunt at many pool parties to come :) We also loved what a goofball Ariel’s friend Scuttle the sea gull was and we loved to imitate him. “Woah what a swim!” Now as my two little girls watch the movie I can’t help but think of Jamie and I being goofy at the poolside.

As we continued through middle school Ariel was replaced by another red head, Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. We both loved the love story and would tell each other “Take Care of You” as the two girlfriends said to each other. And in West Side Story we would cry because Antonio and Maria couldn’t be together. We seemed to really bond over movies where the lovers had a serious challenge to overcome.

We had countless sleepovers at each others houses growing up, late night talks about our bodies changing, kissing boys, our various sports accomplishments, being silly, and DANCING. She had serious moves! I have so many memories with Jamie and the O’Brien family (who always made me feel like I was a part of their family). An unforgettable sailing trip to Saint Michael, “laying out” and strategically prancing in front of the lifeguards in Ocean City, NJ, pool parties, dinner dances, too many to list but I see them all as flashes of light so often when thinking of her.

We changed each others’ names for a while. She wanted to be “Jaymee Oberon” and made a sign for her bedroom door. If you are unaware “Oberon” is from Star Wars, another movie we both loved so much and would watch frequently. In fact she totally stole our VHS box set for a good year or too! She named me “Raygahn Raygee Ragou”. My baby sister Brynne was born when I was 13 and Jamie wanted her to be named “Kia” so that’s what she called her for a while. She certainly was always the most creative with her nicknames.

I knew and loved that she could trust me with her deepest secrets. I took pride in being a confidante of hers. I never judged her or her insecurities and I knew I could trust her as well. I gave her support when she needed it most and she did exactly the same for me.

Another special experience I won’t ever forget is when she and I went to see the Nutcracker Ballet together on New Years Eve when we were in 9th grade. It was our own special date. My mom got us free tickets because at the time she worked upstairs at the Academy of Music in Philadelphia. During the Arabian dance Jamie leaned over to me and whispered “this is my dad’s favorite one”. I LOVED how we both shared a deep appreciation for music. She introduced me to Broadway plays – told me the story of the Phantom of the Opera and we both agreed that we loved the Phantom as Christine did despite his “abhorrent face”…

Although we didn’t share much physical time with each other in the past few years, I think we were still as close as ever in spirit. We shared our challenges and delights of being moms through conversations and loving emails.

Two years ago when my daughter Roxanne was 11 months she underwent an emergency brain surgery. Jamie’s emotional support during this time was amazing. She sent constant words of encouragement and love when I needed it most. We were in the PICU for 12 days and on the day we finally brought Roxanne home, there was a giant beautiful balloon arrangement waiting in our living room from Jamie and Paul. Jamie had no idea before sending them, but the balloons provided the perfect physical therapy for Roxanne. Her incision was at the back of her neck and we were encouraged by her doctors to have her “look up” as much as possible. Perfection.

We also decided that John and Roxanne were to be married… TBD but I am seriously hopeful :)

I remember our final conversation. She called me in late June to tell me that she and Paul had decided to name their baby girl Reagan, spelling it the traditional Gaelic way. It was a short but beautiful conversation in which I can still hear her voice. In fact, every time I begin to weep over her I hear her voice say “awww Ray-gee”, comforting me with her gorgeous reassuring smile and bright green eyes.

It was on my birthday, August 1st- that I heard from the O’Brien’s about Jamie. Just. Heartbroken. I still have a hard time believing it’s really true as I’m sure many of you do too.

In September of last year I uncovered many notes and cards written to each other when we were younger. One was a card from her from 9th grade in which she thanked me for being such a good friend to her. In it she wrote “Don’t ever leave me, I won’t ever leave you.”

I won’t Jamie, and I know you haven’t either.

Jamie – my beautiful, wonderful friend – you are a part of my life every day. I cherish our many memories and love you so much.

– Raygee

 

One Comment

  • maureen obrien says:
    April 24, 2013 at 12:22 pm

    Reply

    Dearest Regan,

    You were, and are, part of our family. Your thoughts on Jamie made me cry, naturally. Thank you so very much for writing it. We love you.

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